Very Veggie Chili

WARNING: This is the kind of vegetarian dish that may make you question - if only for a moment - your lifestyle as an omnivore.

I made this last weekend and I've been eating it all week. A pot of truly gargantuan proportions; too delicious to freeze despite the fact that my fridge has been overflowing with chili for the last few days. Ridiculously easy, ridiculously delicious, and ridiculously cheap (if your local neighborhood convenience store doesn't charge you $3.99 for a single red pepper).

The Key:
1 large diced, roasted eggplant (dice it, spread it out in a baking sheet with some olive oil and roast at 450 for about 30-45, making sure to mix it up halfway through. I snagged this hint from the uber-helpful Elise over at Simply Recipes, which is fantastic. I've cooked probably 5-6 dishes using her recipes and every single one has been a grand slam on the first try. I've mentioned her before; if you're a new reader or if you're one of those readers who "read" but don't "comprehend" then you will not remember. Go to her; take in her reams of digital culinary expertise. She will astound and delight.)

What I used:
1 jalapeno (could've used 2)
2 medium white onions
6 cloves garlic
1 red pepper
3-4 medium diced carrots
1 large zucchini, rough-chopped
1 can black beans (16 oz)
1 can cannellini beans
1 can kidney beans
1 can whole peeled tomatoes, rough-chopped
a bit of balsamic
a bit of red wine vinegar
1/2 a bottle of Smithwick's
a goodly dash of olive oil before you sauté all of the above

Seasonings:
I tend to experiment a lot with seasonings. I used a ton of cumin, red pepper flakes, black pepper, lotsa salt, oregano, cilantro, a dash of cinnamon, a good bit of honey, a few squirts of sriracha, and plenty of cayenne. I love cumin and I like my chili to be heavy on the cumin. If you're inexperienced with this particular spice, go easy on it at first - fairly strong flavor but it's like culinary cocaine from the Levant.

I don't really do exact measurements as I'm in the process of perfecting the recipes for my upcoming cookbook, Esculent Sin: Late Nights in the Kitchen with MRhé.

Follow Elise's recipe and you'll be good. I didn't use red wine or Worcestershire (which I usually do in my meat chilis) or any sort of stock - I ended up adding a couple 28 oz cans' worth of water to get enough liquid initially to get everything mixed well before simmering away the excess but I reckon stock would've been better. Chicken or veggie, no matter. I'm flexible, as should you be.

Aside from this you can put pretty much anything you want in here, with a few caveats:
1) Bring her up to a boil and then long, sloooow simmer. Patience is key. I like it to lose a lot of liquid and cook down into a soft mushy deliciousness.
2) Season after the chili has reduced so you have an accurate idea of the flavor concentration.
3) Don't start cooking without wine at hand. It's just depressing otherwise.

This chili comes out so rich, thick, and hearty, with such great flavors and layers of heat - I mean I just stuffed myself with a huge bowl and I'm getting hungry again writing about it. Cook this to make this horrendous, dismal winter somewhat palatable (literally!)

As always, accompany this with some Jiffy cornbread.

Top with minced red onions, scallions, sour cream, and obscene amounts of cheddar cheese.

And invite me over for dinner.