The Search for the Cantina del Ray; or How I Got a Pack of Mach 3 Razors for Three Bucks

Last night I met up with the Expat, his special lady, and a few other peeps over at Cantina del Ray in Union Square, Somerville. Food was excellent, as were the margaritas. Tough to find good Mexican in the Hub. Places are few and far between. I had some very tasty chiles rellenos with cheese and beef, smothered in salsa verde. ¡Muy caliente y bueno!

But the real story of the night was my cabbie, who spoke with the severe bronchial strain of a man who has spent the balance of his life inhaling the chemical equivalent of car exhaust. I caught the guy at the corner of Hanover and Cross in the North End. "Do you wanna buy a briefcase? Eight bucks!" the cabbie wheezed. It was a decent case - fake black leather, notepad, room for a laptop or perhaps some business papers. It was emblazoned with the seal of Capella University ("taking online education to a higher level"). Wouldn't have been the worst purchase I've ever made, but I decided against it - I was spending money on a cab on a Tuesday night, after all. "Ok," he said, and in the next (labored) breath, "Whaddya shave with? Mach 3? Schick? I got Mach 3s - three bucks!" He really got my attention with this, but I fended this pitch off only to be assaulted by further inventory for sale - hats, sweatshirts, knockoff Coach wallets. I didn't realize I had boarded the Yellow Cab Traveling Variety Store.

I have to give the guy credit, though. His sales pitch was good. Soft yet persistent. Stuck to his key differentiator. Quality goods - "I don't sell shit" - at giveaway prices - "Only problem is I don't charge enough." In a commodity business, price is king. And his audience certainly isn't going anywhere - at least not until they reach their destination.

Really nice guy, too. We drove through Union Square searching for the Cantina. He had some vague idea that he'd been there before - "My girl didn't like the food" (great) - but we didn't see it. The meter hit $13 and he cut it off. He said he'd circle back and drive me around until we found it - "I got nothin' better to do." Not like he has to pick up paying fares or anything. He's raking it in with the side business! Coolest cabbie ever.

After what seemed like a few dollars' worth of driving around, we finally located the fictitious "Cantina del Ray," which was actually called Cantina La Mexicana (attached to the Taqueria La Mexicana). I gave the guy a twenty and told him if he threw in a pack of Mach 3s we'd be even. So he did - and we were. Those things are like eight or nine beans at CVS!

The Cantina was excellent. This coming Monday they are having a live mariachi band along with a promotion for Blue Moon tequila, complete with free samples from its attendant brand ambassadors, the Blue Moon Girls. Get there early!

I might have to go back for the party. Maybe I'll get Willy Loman to drive me again.