An Open Letter to Mother Nature

Dear Mother Nature,

Enough. I know it's still early in the spring for New England, but really. Come on. Have a heart, mamacita. You tease us with a couple 60 degree days, and then you lay out a stretch of days in the 40s with winds that make it feel like it's 25 out. This ain't workin' for me anymore. I'm not asking for 70 off the bat; just stop the bluster, stop the chill. I don't want to wear the puffy coat anymore. Time for your warm embrace; save the coldhearted ish for next fall.

Kill yourself,

-MRhé

P.S. You are a vindictive tart.