An Open Letter to Uncle Sam
How's it hangin' Unc,
I just did my taxes and realize that I owe you a ridiculous amount of money. How wonderful! I was just thinking the other day, "Wow, I made so much money last year; I wish I were legally compelled to shell out an enormous percentage of my income to the federal government come April 15th!" People talk about things like food, shelter, etc. - these are just the trappings of a life of luxury. Heaven forfend I should have enough money in the bank to spoil myself with groceries this month! To tack on an obscene obligatory expenditure to my already taxed (pun intended!) finances - I should like that of all things!
Kill yourself,
MRhé
9 comments:
I feel your pain. In fact, I encourage you to check out last year's entry on my blog, entitled Shitstorm #2.
This year things are different. I encourage you to make sure you are filing as "single filing no deductions" (that means a big 0 on your W-2) for 2007. I also encourage you to have them take out a little extra, however much you can bear, as a forced savings plan. This also means you don't have to come up with money at the end of the year and hand over your (wo)manhood.
Death and taxes.
doesn't your company withhold tax during the year?
I am worried that perhaps MRhe was single filing 1 deduction, which is what I accidentally did one year and ended up owing the government money.
No one ever told me otherwise until I went in and griped at accounting and THEN they decided to take the time to explain that I was paying too little.
Steele: Yes but evidently not enough.
MR: There's the possibility I'm doing this wrong but I find that highly improbable.
That TOTALLY happened to me last year. My mother and her tax guy literally called me at work to ridicule me - I think I had filled in 3 deductions on my W2. They were true though- I'm single, the head of my household, and no one else can claim me as a dependent. WTF!?!?
Now I put zero. In theory I'd still prefer to get more money from my paycheck, invest in equities so that I can gain on that capital during the year, and THEN pay the taxes. But I always end up with a new handbag instead. So it's best if the gov't takes it from me immediately.
if you are single, then you don't also file as head of household, to the best of my knowledge.
Interesting. So, if I take you all correctly, you're saying there's a way I can do this and not have to pay anything.
Sounds fishy to me.
just claim 0 and you cant go wrong...yes you will have more taken out of your check but you will get paid by the gov and can frivolously spend same
in case anyone wants clarification, i just learned while doing my reading for fed tax that "head of household" means unmarried but with a dependent.
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